sometimes i wonder if i didn’t try hard enough. sometimes i wonder if it even takes any trying at all. sometimes i wonder if i was too stubborn and wasn’t compassionate enough. sometimes i wonder what things would be like if i didn’t end it all. sometimes i miss it and sometimes i wish things could have been better. sometimes i wonder if i was just too scared to give my whole heart away. too scared of being vulnerable. i don’t like not being in control of myself or my emotions. i don’t like giving someone else that control of me.  i don’t want to be someone’s everything…i just want to be part of it.