things in my journal…
“venting”
how did i get here, to this place i don’t know? confusion and hurt but its also soothing my soul. i feel so lost but i know right where i am. between heartache and happiness, tears and relief, loneliness and loss. life isn’t easy. but maybe it should be. love should be easy, something you just feel not that you force. happiness should just come, it shouldn’t have to be found. i don’t know if i was pretending or trying to overcome. some questions have no answers, maybe its suppose to just be that way. everything happens for a reason and sometimes we’ll never know. i think its kinda better that way.
“love.”
in this life our main goal is to find love, to be loved and love in return. our whole lives we search for the perfect person, a companion. someone to laugh with, someone to lay in bed all day with, someone to take care us even when we don’t need it. someone to be completely consumed in and be yourself with. but what if that search is complete. what if you’ve found that person sitting right next to you and you’ve just never realized it before. what if the rest of your life is sitting right in front of you, smack dab in your face? what do you do? do you risk it all and pray for the best? or do you sit back and wait for that person to figure out what you already have? why can’t it be easier? nothing ever is…nothing worth energy is ever easy. but if you wait too long your chance might be gone…you will never get what you want if you take the back seat in life..so always obey your heart ♥
“life.”
in life you meet people. people who really change your life. people who make you laugh and smile and pick you up when you fall. and sometimes in life you meet people who you never thought would hurt you, but they do. people who break your heart. people who make you cry and push you down. but that is what life is about. life is about finding those people that will pick you up and whipe your tears. people that have a shoulder to cry on. and those people that pushed you down only matter because eventually they make you into a better person, a stronger person. people will stab you in the back. and in life you will only have a handful of true friends. so appericate them, don’t take them for granted. life is a hard journey and you’ll need people that’ll pick you up and whipe your tears when you fall.
“cycles.”
as i sit here and look through the lost friendships and romances, i’ve realized that people change. everything is always changing and never the same, emotions, personalities, and environments change. we’re constantly adapting or learning to cope. lives disappear and new one are gained. its an on going cycle. so why are we put on this earth? is it to see how much we can take or how great we can eventually come? every footstep we take is bringing us to another part in our lives. everything we’ve gone through to this exact moment has made us who we are right now. so really the saying is true….everything does happen for a reason. all the smiles, tears, laughter, and brokeness has shaped us into what person we are. and though those friendships and romances seem to be lost, they will never truely be lost, because memories will always be pictures in our minds that will always be remembered.
